So we moved again. If you define moving as relocating all the contents you own from one home to another, (and not necessarily changing jobs or cities), this move makes JR and my 12th move in 12 years. Granted, some of the moves were from temporary corporate accommodations into homes, so that the one-move-a-year is a bit misleading. In fact, we lived in Bloomington Indiana, for 5 years, in two homes, when the girls were little. But it does all "average out" to a constant flow of major change for our family.
Over the years, with each move we prepared for, each box we filled, we increased our resolve to "not move again, for a long, long while." With each home we planned for and created, our intent was to fill it with as much time as we did memories. And yet, JR and I are looking at what is likely the smack center of our full nest family years with the reality that we have not stay in one location long enough to be one years worth of memories deep. And this pains me. And yet we just did it again.
I am sure the reasons run fast and above and below the surface. The front page memo documents that we moved because JR was completing a 4 hour round trip commute to our chosen home, on top of a 60 hour work schedule and we were priced out of our local, beloved private school education - the ENTIRE reason that we moved to the EastBay in the first place - so we had no specific commitment or reason to stay in a place that had finished it's purpose. We rolled the dice to seek to meet our girls twice exceptional learning needs in the most direct, meaningful way we could find, with hopes that it would give for years to count, but we lost a big hand, and only cashed in a year of living there.
It was not all for loss. Because of the drive to seek funding for specialized education, JR was able to land some very good professional opportunities that have positioned him well. This may be the silver lining in what has been a hard crash entrance into moving and living in California. In addition to the professional opportunities, we know the diversity of thought and experience that California holds is an invaluable teacher for our daughters and our family. But we are like many are asking, how can we realistically and faithfully hold to our values and goals while living in California? (I'll get back to you when I have an answer.)
So when we looked at all of the realistic and feasible options that would reduce the strain and loss of commuting and still offer the chance to live our family values and needs - specifically how can we continue to work towards the professional opportunity (ie.income flow) and the exceptional (gifted/disabled) needs support for our family? Living near JR's current work opportunity just made the best sense.
So in July the decision was made. The last week of July our new rental home was secured on the Peninsula and purging and packing commenced. The first week of August our home was on the market for sale. After consultation with several conversations with trusted mentors into the girls lives, the decision was made to enroll them in the local public school, with the transfer of their individual education and 504 plans. The third week of August we were humbly excited to close on our home sale, able to take away most of the money that we had invested into building that home and dream. It is not lost on us that that yoke of California home ownership could have drowned us and we were able to leave with just minor "bumps and bruises" and a heap more wisdom. We are incredibly grateful. We rounded out August with the beginning of school and the introduction of new faces, expectations, opportunities, and routines. For any exceptional family, this can be a recipe for melt down - and we've had our fair share of those. But even with our family's intensity amped, we've walked forward into September with much lighter step, more connection to each other and the things we hold dear. There is a great deal of hope and opportunity for us to take hold of with the forward steps from this most recent move.
As I write this, I still can't quite figure out how we successfully moved through such changes. Yet, even still, I am very proud. Proud of how we came together as a family, how we each sacrificed and supported one another, so that the family's greatest good can be served. There is no doubt that each of us truly sacrificed to make it happen, consequences that will be felt for time to come. And yet, we are beginning to taste the fruit of the change and much of it is sweet. While the last 3 months, my time towards Nomad's Antidote© was sacrificed, I am incredibly happy to have the chance now to return to it and other pursuits. One of the fruits of this moving sacrifice change is that our family has a better developed local (public & private) exceptional needs team, I have more space and time to give towards Nomad's Antidote© JR has been home and happy (and awake) SO MUCH MORE. The girls are positive and optimistic when going into their new school and we are starting to see new stride. Now that JR and I have more attention to our needs, our intent is that we will be even better able to journey with and serve our girls. It is a one step at a time work of love.
But the love does not stop there. Our family and I seek to gather community, across the table, the street, the country, and the world.... to extend the seats at the table for all..... to practice living love..... this is what I look forward to being more about.
Melinda is a recovering "normal" seeker, who is often distracted by unexpected moments of nature's beauty or questioning children